What do you do when...

What do you do when you read a story that is similar to one of your own ideas and is perfect in almost every way? In some ways its depressing. I begin to think that there is no way that I could write something as strong as this. In some ways its encouraging, because if they did it and it worked well, then I can too.

I just read "Idols" by Tim Gautreaux in the June 22 issue of The New Yorker. One of the most powerful short stories I've read all year and it follows almost the same plot structure as my story, "Red Truck" (not that I'm bragging). Obviously his was done first, and certainly more powerful than mine is considering mine is still in the draft stages. The main character is torn down by his obsession and effectively alienates his only hope in friendship and help. Its beautiful. Depressing, sure, but beautiful in the way well-written stories are. Read it and revel in its greatness.

So, now, what do I do? Do I sit and wallow in the fact that my basic story idea has already been done, and most likely better than I could pull it off? Or do I use this as inspiration to make mine better and more powerful? It's daunting either way you look at it.

Book Review On-The-Go and More!

Generally I prefer to avoid exclamation points, but I figured the one in the title is justified this time. I've decided to start a new segment of the blog: "Book Review On-The-Go." Instead of reading a book and the presenting you with a review, I will provide updates on my impression of the book as I read it. On the whole, I'm a busy reader with four magazine subscriptions (one weekly, one bi-weekly, two monthly, all of which I read extensively) and usually a couple books going at the same time. Therefore updates might not be as frequent as I'd like, but maybe this will speed me up.

The first book up for an "On-The-Go" review is Self-Editing for Fiction Writers: How to edit yourself into print by Renni Browne and Dave King. I had seen this book mentioned and praised on other blogs, and seeing how I'm editing myself at the moment, I decided to pick up a copy. An intro and three chapters in, I'm not entirely impressed. In general, I find their advice and explanations to be over-simplified. Occasionally they'll strike a chord and I'll have one of those, "I haven't thought of it that way before" moments.

Browne and King have a nasty habit of taking a classic like Lonesome Dove or The Great Gatsby and suggesting 'better' ways certain passages could have been written. Maybe this is to make the young writer feel less over-shadowed by the greats. Maybe this is to simply use well-known examples. Or maybe this technique rose from over-grown editor egos. (Disclaimer: I love editors, have served as one myself, and believe many great journalists and writers had brilliant editors.)

Chapter One, "Show and Tell," focused exactly on what you might think it. You've got to show the read what's happening rather than tell it to them...at least most of the time. Of course some narration is necessary. This is their point. It's a great chapter to open with, because it's a problem we all deal with and definitely something that beginning writers might not even think about. If you've taken any creative writing classes you're not missing much by skipping this.

Chapter Two, "Characterization and Exposition." It's almost a continuation of chapter one and therefore its logical successor. Again, minimal help here for those who've had training, but it did hold some nuggets. The writers do a good job of stressing that characters should be defined and described mainly through their actions, rather than an introductory narrative description.

Chapter Three, "Point of View." Browne and King stress that the only points of view that need to be discussed or even considered are first, third and omniscient. I have always been taught that you should find a point of view (first, second, third) and a distance (how omniscient) and stick with it all the way through. Sure, there are great examples where authors broke this rule; Faulkner did it in As I Lay Dying, where each chapter was presented from a different character's perspective. However, these editors seem to say that as long as you don't get too confusing or intimate with one POV than another you can jump around. Sounds dangerous to me.

More general details and brief chapter reviews to come.

On that note: I have completed small revisions for the second draft of "Red Truck." But, having read it over a couple times and discussing the few others who have also, I have decided to re-write the whole thing in third person rather than first. I've only dealt with the intro couple of pages and things are already looking up. This story might have a future after all.

Let the Editing Begin!

So, I have begun the editing process on "Red Truck." I printed out two hard copies, one for me and one for my wife, and have started marking up the pages with relish.

Today, however, I have yet to pick up the manuscript. But, I've been busy. I followed up on two job applications and am hoping/praying for a call or two. I did a bit of a recap on all of my submissions of "Gullible Jack;" I found out that one journal rejected me without notification and I sent a query to another that has taken its time. I have six submissions still pending. Also, I heard back from Benjamin Percy who had some good advice to give. It's encouraging to talk to published short story authors. On that note I also have attempted to contact an old fiction professor of mine in hopes that she will be willing to help me edit "Red Truck."

In other, somewhat related news, I came across the blog Words on the Page written by Lori Widmer. She has declared tomorrow, May 15, as Writers Worth Day. The goal is to express that the work writers do is worth more than the little, if any, compensation they are given. Low pay pay for news, reporting and freelancing is a problem that the journalism and publishing communities are facing now more than ever. Going beyond raising awareness, Lori is posting career tips and information for writers all month. Please check out her blog and show your support as well.

Now, I'm off to do some editing, maybe a little reading and then hitting the hay.

Rough Draft Complete

Over the past few years I have written five or six short stories that I can consider mostly complete and a number of others that are still in early drafts. Out of all of those I'm only proud of a couple of them. "Red Truck" draft #1 is officially complete. I love the way this story is going, but man do I have a lot of revising, rewriting, and just editing in general to do. It is rough in the truest sense of the word. But, I'm excited. Now that the framework is down I can really start get at the meat and the details of the story, thereby making it truly beautiful. Beauty, that's what all artists strive for in one way or another, right?

There is a lot in this writing blog community of ours about self-editing and revision like this post at The Blood-Red Pencil. I think this will be my process of editing for now:

1. I will get my wife and maybe one or two others to read it and have them give me their honest thoughts on the story as a whole.

2. Print out the manuscript and mark up the hard copy with micro-editing and notes on larger issues. I might even lay out pages at a time on the floor to get a bigger-picture view.

3. Take notes in my notebook about scenes and details that need addressing.

4. Read and re-read the hard copy.

5. Begin making changes.

But first, I think I'll take the rest of the weekend off and give my brain a break from the story. How do you self-edit and revise? I'm interested in any tips or suggestions.

The "How Could I Not See That Coming" Moment

Subtlety is a difficult thing to accomplish in writing. How do you convey something important about a character by showing/not telling and be sure that the reader will catch on? How do you hint at a disturbed past without going into detail?

A use of subtlety that I'm most interested in is foreshadowing, a common technique in mystery fiction. I was reading the short story "A Perfect Day for Bananafish" by J.D. Salinger last night and was struck by the simple, but impacting construction of it. He made it clear early on that something bad would happen. Then mid-way he stilled my fears by a delightful, heartwarming scene. But the third part happened quickly and made me feel foolish for forgetting about the first scene. It was a "how could I not see that coming" moment. While this is hardly the best or most complex example, it still worked.

The key is to not trick the reader. This should not be a deus ex machina. There should be an element of shock to the reader, but also an "Ah HA" aspect as well. They should then remember past elements of the book/story and realize that you planned this. "Bananafish" would not have worked had the first scene not been there. There would have been no reason for the end to happen the way it did. (I'm trying not to give away too much, but everyone should find this story and read it.)

That kind of foreshadowing is what I'd like to be able to produce in "Red Truck." Actually, I'm trying for two types of the subtlety. In parts, I want the reader to be aware of things that Margie, my tragedy, is not and later her feel foolishly for not seeing it. In other ways, I want the traditional type of foreshadowing, where I leave hints here and there to lead up to the end. I'm going to try to keep my eyes open for this kind of subtlety in my reading here on out.

I'm so close to finishing the first draft. I'm quite a slow writer. I think I'm thinking too much about revision to finish. There is just too much going on: job applications, working, magazine reading, other reading. Hopefully, the next post will be about the finishing of the first draft and the beginning of revision. Oh, how I love revision!

Truckin' on...

I apologize for long absence. There has just been a lot to do around the apartment, lots of little things like re-registering the car and other such headaches.

I just received my eighth rejection yesterday for "Gullible Jack." I am now down to half of submissions remaining out, four of which I might be hearing from soon (my guess from their estimated response time). This latest rejection came from Fifth Wednesday Journal. They, out of all the rejections thus far, have been the only one to provide feedback. I can't tell you how appreciative I was. This gave me hope for several reasons. 1. They took the time to evaluate my work and didn't just read it and toss it. They care for their writers. 2. And I quote: "I admire the story’s risk-taking." That's always nice to hear. 3. The majority of their suggestions and comments were things I had struggled and fought over, and now I have a better idea of where to take the story should it not get picked up be any of the other eight submissions still out.

I think I'm realizing one of my weaknesses as a writer, not including my A.D.D. I have a hard time providing enough background and, for lack of a better term, psychological evidence for what is taking place in the story. Apparently, I tend to focus too much on the here and now of the piece. I will keep this in mind as I wrap up the first draft of "The Red Truck" and go through the editing process.

A question for you writers out there: How do you write a first-person narrative without using "I" in almost every sentence? Right now that's what it feels like is happening to me.

Consider This the Bumper

Here is a piece of "Red Truck." Again, not married to the title. Consider this the bumper. With my wedding coming up quickly (just over a week now) writing has taken a bit of a back seat. Enjoy and let me know what you thought of the ride.

The day the red truck arrived I was too tired to care. I had been at work, unloading new reams of fabric since 8 a.m. Two customers forced me to waste a total of thirty feet of cloth because they couldn’t make up their minds. The blonde girl said she was student at the nearby design school. I know more about fabric than she ever will. All in all it wasn’t too bad; Jay came in.

...

The next morning I awoke to the smell of coffee wafting into my bedroom. Sometimes I imagine waking to find a man, shirtless and in pajama pants, in the kitchen pouring a hot cup and saying, “I was just about to bring this to you.” But really I had set the pot’s timer for 6:30 a.m. I poured a cup for myself, topped it off with heavy cream and sat in front of the television for my morning dose of news. The weatherman promised snow for my area starting that night; it could total ten inches over the next couple of days, he said.